The Cat's Out of The Bag

Not literally. You shouldn't put cats in a bag. They don't particularly like it. I'm pretty sure I've tried.
Anyway, you may recall about a month ago, I posted that my clinic was no longer going to do large animal.

The reason was a combination of BF retiring, BR not wanting to do large animal any more and thus leaving only me and TH to do it all. From there, it depends on what you want to believe regarding who wants to really do large animal/emergencies and so on. I'm going to reiterate how upset it makes me. At first, I wasn't sure what I was going to do. As much as I like doing farm calls and working on large animals, I do struggle with it. I've become very proficent at small animal medicine. What really upset me though was wondering what the farmers were going to do. To me, there wasn't much time for them to find a new vet. I felt like we were betraying them. Felt like we were being unethical. BF reassured me that he was going to still be around even if he was retiring. He was going to keep a few herds for repro work too.
I asked about sick work for BF's herd and it looked like maybe I could do some of that. Joe and I discussed it and to me, an occasional goat in the office or sick cow on emergency when no one else could be gotten wasn't enough. I felt somewhat betrayed. I felt we were betraying the staff that had horses. I felt betrayed because here I was four months from having a wedding in a place that no longer held my perfect job. Decisions weren't made quickly. There was more planning and more time leading up to me finding out. I feel betrayed that I couldn't of known sooner.
Joe and I discussed it and it was decided that I should look for a new job. Thursday, I told the staff. I figured they deserved it. That and lots of questions were going to be raised when I was gone all this week. I've been on a few interviews and they all have seemed to go well. I'd really like to stay in Pennsylvania but am willing to go whereever there's a good job with equal mixed animals.
It wasn't easy to tell the staff. They have been my best friends and mentors for two years. They have made me into the vet I am today. They have tolerated my ignorance, rambling and crazy ideas regarding treatment. They have listened to things that they didn't have to. I'll miss them dearly.
I wish I didn't feel like I betrayed them. I wish I didn't have to leave. I really thought this was going to be the place where I was going to work forever...BUT I know if I don't move on now, I never will. Three months to allow for all the changes will turn to six, six months will turn to a year and a baby. A year will turn to five to ten to twenty years and then I'll look back and wonder what happened to me doing large animal medicine? I really liked it.
I can only hope that the next job is as good as the first. That the vets are as good of mentors, that the techs are as well trained and tolerant and that medicine can be practiced as well as I practice it now. I can only hope that the next job IS the job that I'll be at forever. (That and Joe doesn't want to move again.)